2020 Edition

 2020 has been awful, the economy has gone down, loads of jobs have been lost, and what's worst many lives have unfortunately been lost. In the words of Winifred "Oh look, another glorious morning, Makes me SICK!!!" it's sickening all this uncertainty. Wait!  did I forget to mention earth was struck by a global pandemic, well it has and it ain't fun. Now I don't want to sit here and pout about life but god only knows how much I miss walking around Target enjoying some hot coffee. 

I had to post something on this Blog, it means so much to me!!! I also just realize what a gem this blog is, in terms of tracking my every thought and just plain random human activities hahahaha! without further ado let's have a yearly recap, shall we! 

2020 was a year of growth, this part is the most important part! NOW don't get me wrong I'm not walking around saying you're toxic, she's toxic , everyone's toxic, that's plain stupid. However, I'm done with never taking the time to work on myself, internally,  not letting go of things. Replaying scenarios in my head allowing them to control my mood. With a little help from therapy and some self-help books, I managed to refrain from my instincts of self-sabotage. I STOPED telling myself and others my "tale of woe" (I never did tell others much) but regardless, it was important for me to understand that, that story doesn't define me, and more importantly, that story is in the past,. I learned the power of letting go! also I have a very nonjudgmental point of view, my father along with my brother decided to go their separate ways, have different beliefs, different morals, the path they took is no concern of mine. I learned to digest those emotions to prevent myself from becoming a bitter person, I also learned when to extract myself from harmful situations, and I understood I don't have to be the peace-maker of my family. This will be a long journey but it's a journey I'm willing to take.

Happiness, this continues to be my objective! but this word is tricky, I don't want to chase it, I just want to live it. Like a butterfly, if you try to catch it, it will escape your hand,  but if I'm working hard in my garden it might just rest on my arm for me to enjoy. 

Gratitude has been my go-to this year.

I'm grateful for my husband who (this morning) packed me a Ziploc bag that had cheese ball puffs, and on the bag, he wrote "eat these last" in black marker hahahah. He knows I will probably eat my veggies last and junk food first lol! You are soooo adorable, You are the LOVE of my life, I created this mini playlist for you:

Marcus Mumford "When I get my hands on you"

Mumford & Sons "Ghosts that we knew"

Mary J.Blige "Everything"

Natalia Lafourcade "Tu si sabes quererme"  

Cold Cave "Promised Land"

The Church "Under the Milky Way"

Depeche Mode "Just can't get enough" 

Nick Cave & The Bad Seed "Into my arms"

Belanova "Tus Ojos"

Blink 182 "First Date"

Radiohead "All I need"

Mariah Carey "Always be my baby"

I'm grateful for my mother, who makes me laugh and challenges my inner Frodo, when I think of her I think of the following: “Al final del infinito entre ríos púrpura Nos volvemos a encontrar” we will get through life together and I will always be seeing you in this world and in Paradise. 

And for my friends that through thick and thin have stood by my side, who never forget to call or text, who kept it real, my heart is yours. I'm talking about REAL friends, not the ones that hang with you to get something and then they leave, I'm talking about the priceless gems: they are the family you have chosen for yourself the ones who truly care for you! that understand you, that cry with you but also dance with you ................We are not perfect but Prov 17:17 is totally us! my friends have sacrificed time, their own commitments in life to be with me one way or another, And for that, I am grateful.. 

I have many plans for 2021,  I'll be sure to record.